Went to see the Notaire today with some preconceived notions about DeE.
Some bad but mostly good.
Bad first. My share of my wife’s share of our house and possessions diminishes the older I get.
Although I don’t want to, this would make it even more impossible to return to live in England.
The 2 cars that were always in my name are part of the pot, she owned half of them because they were bought from our joint account. Not important but might be a bit more complicated if I wanted to sell them.
The costs of the gravestone and surrounds cannot be paid from her LEP so must be borne by me. Fair enough, half of that grave is mine to keep, one day. 
The good, My bank was wrong to say that Fran’s LEP savings account was totally frozen to me at the moment of her death. It is in fact only closed to me until the whole succession regarding her children is sorted out. That could be sometime but it doesn’t matter to me as I was not counting on that money anyway.
He confirmed that the funeral expenses can be paid directly by the bank to the Pompe Funebre from that account though, just as we thought, but once the succession is sorted the whole of what is left is mine because of my rights of usufrut until I die, so none of it goes to her children. Until I die. They, and I, were under the impression that the remainder of that account was split between us immediately, not so.
One of the things I was tasked to do to bring to this meeting was to list all details of her children, so that the succession can be formalised. Out of contact, by their choice, of the 2 sons and since 2 years, of the daughter, the only way to get this information was for me to write to the daughter. She, presumably sensing their monetary advantage, was quick to reply giving all details of names, dates of birth, dates of marriage, profession and bank detalis. In doing so, though it doesn’t matter to me, the details of the son in Ireland who changed all his details to avoid contact, has now given me everything.
However, something else has occurred to delay matters. The eldest son, who nearly died and was hospitalised due to alcoholism and then immediately sought refuge in the pub (he was there when I visited to try and regain contact last year so I never saw him) has not been able, apparently, to list his own details. The information came from his Dad, the father with whom he was estranged. This has given rise to the suspicion by the Notaire that he is not mentally competant and therefore may need some sort of guardian to act on his behalf. More delays
He gave me 3 tasks.
Get a valuation of the house and terrain, aleady started that with a message to the estate agent friend who sold it to us over 30 years ago.
Find the deeds to the house or, if I can’t, pay another €50 to the €50 already paid, for them to get copies themselves.
Try to find out by contact with the daughter and/or Fran’s 1st husband, what the situation is with the eldest son.
None of this affects me adversely apart from the cost of the headstone, so all in all a very good hour and a half spent. He even invited Jules into the office because he saw me walking him in the grounds while I was waiting. 
Bear in mind that our 2 LEPs, though in individual names, were controlled by both of us and built up in the same way.
), I have since my last post received a request to send an email to the woman who has taken took the case in the other office confirming my phone call from the main office.